Playlist 1.0

Oasis - Dont look back in anger

Radiohead - weird fishes

Damien Rice - cold water

Explosions in the Sky - your hand in mine

Bon Iver - Blood bank

Bloc Party - blue light

Hello Goodbye - Two weeks in Hawaii

My Morning Jacket - Wordless Chorus

LCD Soundsystem - All my friends

Minus the Bear - Pachuca Sunrise 

Oasis - She's Electric

What's the Story (morning glory)

The Blog Inspired By Reappearance 

It seems to me that there are some people in our lives that will always show up at the worst of times. This does not particularly mean that you do not miss them or want to see them, but the fact of the matter is that your life was working quite well without them. Yes, I am talking about you two. I know that you will always be there, and it is reassuring to know that, but god damn you always seem to leave me in shambles and the first time that I am happy since, you stumble on into my life to cause more mischief. 

Why now? you think that seeing you with someone else will make me miss you? well you are right. But it also reminds me of how immature and childish you were. It does not make me want to get back in touch with you, actually it kind of makes me want to do the opposite hence why I have blocked you on facebook and regected your phone number. Yet somehow you can still get ahold of me. Fuck technology. I dont want you in my life right now sir, because for once I am happy... for once I have found an actual genuinely great guy who I deserve and who will always treat me right. For once i havent gone for a cocky insecure and immature fellow. And it feels quite nice, yes yep I kinda love it. 

And this amazingly genuine guy may just be the guy for me. Dont realize what you've got until its gone... that's how the saying goes right? Im smart enough to have chosen someone who actually respects and cares for me. Weird how you thought you were the best I'd ever have. 

And as for you trying to get in touch with me all of a sudden now that I am truly unavailable - you should stop trying because I have finally moved on. 

Even though this entry may state the opposite...

It was nice at least to get it off of my shoulders. 

Goodbye for never mister. 

;; one missed call

Udoubtedly from you...

YOU

who are always there

YOU

who understand me

YOU

who can fix me

But I didnt answer. I hope thats ok.

It's just one of those days I guess

Or rather,

One of those weeks.

My sincere apologies

;;

The raindrops in my background describe my day perfectly.
:(

Life - in a nutshell

The blog inspired by change

'Life is full of choices', but isn't 'change inevitable'? Sometimes it's tough to think about the future... that is most certainly why I do not. But lately the future seems to continue to creep up on me, and some decisions must be made.

I would like to say that highschool is hard -  and I am sure I would not stand alone there, but is life - the real world not way more demanding and stressful? I can cry all I want about my 85% average, or my lack of time, or my sleepy social life, but all those things combined will not amount to the gravity of the decisions I have to make next. Change is inevitable. I can't forget that. I don't think Im ready for this much change though....

I had planned to go immediately to university next year, but stay in my hometown as to not worry about finances while Im still a teen. I want to go to Calgary now. I know, I know, Rachael's being a drama queen. But it is a real big step for me, and I don't think many people understand - not even some of my close friends do. If When I go everything is going to change. I feel that I need to, however. As a form of self discovery... self sufficiency... and mostly just to see if I can do it on my own. Life, that is.

Go Dinos?

I guess I can really narrow it down to my concerns. Family is a real issue. I can't say I always get along with my family, but they are without a doubt my biggest support system in school and life. What would I do without them there? What if the heater breaks down? I can't just call up daddy to help me out! Friends... well a good chunk of mine are going away. And I have one of my closest friends in Calgary... maybe it's perfect? But at the same time, am I ready to be away from everyone I have grown up with? Boyfriend. Boyfriend, boyfriend. Do people last when they try the long distance thing? Will he be missing out if he's just worrying about me?...will I be? My Job is amazing. Flawless. what if I dont find another like that? ...I can come back in the summers though. Kelowna - your beautiful summers, and your warm ish winters. Will I become a popsicle in Alberta?

Will I make it out there, or transfer back home, head hung...defeated by the 'big city'?