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Friday, November 26, 2010

Salts.

I constantly find it difficult to explain to others my experience on this trip; the amount of joy it has brought to me, the quality of each and every  moment spent aboard that ship. Those people, that place, was indescribable. I believe people cannot truly comprehend the affect that this trip had on each and every one of us, unless they experience it themselves. But I have finally stumbled across an answer; a way to illuminate them. I’ve retold this story to friends light-heartedly, however, it was the worst feeling I have had to endure in a long, long time. This bracelet. This sailing bracelet that I spent one evening making in the cosy comfort of the foxhole  amongst all of my marvellous shipmates, means the world to me. This one object, created with a waxy thin line, brought me to tears last Tuesday. I play indoor soccer... the least competitive, amusing and hilarious sport known to woman. I was in a perfectly content mood out on the field, until the referee approached me. I thought nothing of his order at the time, “Please take off your jewellery before you continue to play.” I slipped off my sailing bracelet and stuffed it into the depths of my socks for safe keeping. Needless to say, this moment of absence was to cause me the most unhappiness I have felt in months. As I raced out to the car after the game ended, my heart started to sink. Had I checked for my bracelet while on the bench? Did I make sure that it would not disappear on me? I jumped into the car, put on my seat belt, and ripped down both of my socks simultaneously. My stomach dropped. I didn’t hear a word my boyfriend said the whole way home, I just sat there, in shock, a blank stare on my face. I could not believe it. I didn’t know whether to cry or scream. This was my bracelet. This was not an object, it was a symbol. It’s not about the waxy thin layer of rope that lay over my skin, it is so much more than that. To say that this bracelet is full of great memories would be an understatement. Each and every time I look down at my wrist I remember who I was on that boat. That is the person I want to be. I am so ashamed when I think about how I have shifted away from that person since I have been back at school, and this is why I continue to wear the bracelet. I am not here to say that school corrupts, (Haha! What a debate that would be) but to put a spot light on judgement and conformation and loyalty. I have never felt more free than I did aboard  the Swift, and have never met more sincere and loyal people than I did that week.  It represents who I want to be... this is why I was still in shock when walking into my house. My hands shook as I undid my cleats and slowly pulled them off. Nothing. I rolled my socks down, and untied my shin guards and there. There it was. Sitting comfortably nestled in the fabric of my shin guards, unscathed. Hundreds of hot tears began to stream down my face. I slid my body down to the floor and sat there, crying, holding my bracelet. A faint smile spread across my face, and the tears continued to roll down my cheeks and onto the floor. I have never felt so relieved in my life.
To all those who were aboard the Swift on October 18th to 22nd: I love you all so much. You are my greatest friends, and I miss you all. Thanks for making it so so so much fun J

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